Sometimes I have enough of my own perception of everything. So much so that I am willing to spend an evening being bored to death. Just to stare into space. Just ‘ins Blaue hinein’. I can’t tell you exactly how that process goes, but I can tell you that it took me 56 years of my life to find out that not every thought deserves a second chance. In fact, some thoughts can be completely neglected. And I think that is very liberating.
Because that saying that what you give attention to, grows, is SO true.
In addition, I find it just – dead simple – reassuring that you can also lose yourself delightfully in boring yourself. I don’t call it that, by the way, because to the best of my knowledge, I am still in procession to review certain things. But also to look ahead. Just to think about the Big Nothing. With me, 1,001 new ideas then arise almost immediately. Which I want to tackle almost all at once, but sometimes nothing comes of it. I even forgive myself for that.
If only I had realized this 20 or more years ago!
If only I had realized then that not every thought is worth thinking. To think about again. Now I can let go of those thoughts with peace of mind. I could swear that this has given me a more positive mindset, but first I had to learn to allow myself that.
What a full head isn’t good for…
